I have some questions… April 7, 2007

We were talking today about sex changes. About how it changes the naughty bits and how you define yourself sexually. Now I have LOTS of questions.

Like…

1. If you’re in a gay relationship and your partner goes through a sex change how do you define your sexual orientation?
2. I mean, are you now a heterosexual?
3. If you became a lesbian because you didn’t like cock and now your partner has one, what do you do?
4. And if you fell in love with a person who was one sex and now they’ve changed, are you still physically attracted to them?
5. I’m a firm believer that you can love a person and NOT be ‘in love’ with them. So, if someone that you are ‘in love’ with goes through a sex change are you really still ‘in love’ with them or do you just love them?
6. Wouldn’t a change, as big as this, change the core of a person?
7. Do people that go through this, define themselves by it?
8. Now, I’ve seen a lot of Discovery but— what do they do with all of the naughty bits? I have a vague understanding of the male-to-female change (it’s what’s covered on Discovery) but, what happens from female-to-male? Is it just a nip here— an a appendage there?It just seems very complicated all the way around.

The talk moved from here (because we were just all too overwhelmed) to gay sex (the boy kind) and more questions. The question of the hour; is someone always the top and the other always the bottom? It seems that in most heterosexual couples one person is always being penetrated, but since gay men have the option of who gets penetrated, do they take advantage of this opportunity? Hearing snippets of conversation that my gay friends have had, it doesn’t seem that this is the case. I mean, if I had a cock, I’d want to use it.

Snow day April 5, 2007

Wow! Over a foot of snow. No Work— snowday! Off to Sunday River.

Idol April 5, 2007

What the fuck! Sorry for letting the Jersey (as in New Jersey) out but this season is so messed up! If it isn’t bad enough that Sanjaya is still in the game but now tits-and-ass (Haley) has won out over talent. If it weren’t for Blake and Jordin I don’t know if I’d continue to tune in.

Dreaming of shoes buried under snow April 5, 2007

With pajamas inside out and spoons under the pillow—dreaming of a snow day tomorrow. Sunday River?
We’re expected to get 9” tonight. It’s April and my peep-toe shoes are calling from the closet, still in their box, they’ll have to stay in hibernation a bit longer it seems.

Living in a Rockwell painting April 5, 2007

I’m just sitting here, baby in bed, snow falling and thinking about how great life really is here in Maine. What a difference. Last time it snowed we were out of town and came home to 1’ of snow. We were sort of dreading coming home—would we even be able to pull into the driveway? To our surprise we came home to a plowed driveway and sidewalk, our neighbor had plowed both while we were away. WOW! This neighborly act definitely never happened in NJ. It’s reminiscent of an earlier time.

Blog? April 1, 2007

Why a blog? Why now? I figured it’s time to move out of my comfort zone. To try something that I’ve never done before… something that doesn’t come naturally to me. I’m a bit of a control freak. I like order. I like to know what I’m getting into. I’ve never been a confident writer and I’m definitely not one to talk about REAL things with anyone but my husband, Kevin.

So here goes nothing…

a year ago my family and I moved to Maine. Maybe this doesn’t seem that odd, but to many people it seemed like a step backwards. We lived in an area of great growth and great wealth, not that WE were wealthy, and within a commutable distance to NYC. We had a house, a dog and a child. From the outside, things must have seemed ideal. I can just hear my friends and family saying “They have the house with the white picket fence. Why would they want to give that up?”. To us, it seemed like the life we always scoffed at. I mean— did we need Dockers and Izods to live it? It felt like it. We were living in an area that lacked creativity and that embraced the idea of ‘bigger is better’. With Hummers in every driveway and big ugly houses, built on what used to be farmland, starting in the ‘low 800’s’. We felt a long way from art school, stifled and isolated. We felt as though we had few people to relate to.

We found ourselves no longer working in NYC, and feeling like we’d been punched in the gut— left gasping for air and unable to catch our breath. In some ways we lost that part of ourselves that loved life and liked to run against the grain. We missed the grit, the people, and in a sense the reality that ny offered. This move in many ways was the most honest thing that we’ve done in a longtime. It’s one of the few decisions that we’ve made were we actually put ourselves first. It’s not that we didn’t think about our extended family or the impact that this move would inevitably have on them. But, this time we put OUR family’s life first. Now a year later we’ve found home— at least for now.